The build – 3 weeks in

Next week we’ll put the roof on our house!! Bet you didn’t expect that comment!!! 🙂

But yip they’re started three weeks ago and are MOOOOOVING!

We have been really lucky as well because it has seemed to have rained in the evenings and we’ve had dry days.

Still a little sad that we won’t be in by Christmas, due to our crappy neighbour delaying us 6 weeks, but also know it’s probably for the best with new baby coming……Payback is a beeeaaaatch though because I heard from the estate that he’s been issued with an order to comply, for his illegal walls he put up with no plans. Apparently the inspector from the municipality was on site to check that we are complying and noticed that he has walls up. He’s a new guy so quite a rule follower and thorough and went back to the office and pulled our neighbour’s plans only to find there are no plans for the walls. So he issued him with a written notice to comply or else. You see it doesn’t pay to try bend the rules!!!

I must say this is one thing that our architect has been really good at. He really knows his stuff and has made sure that we comply the whole way….and at least we know that when we get to the end of this build we will have no problems getting our papers done and getting into our house….

I wont lie I still sometimes lie in bed thinking about those first two months and the stress that our neighbour caused us….I still can’t get over how he behaved all because we said we didn’t want to go halves on a a giant wall because of light issues. He went out of his way to threaten us , saying he’d put a stop to our build etc etc and all for a wall and the best part ON HIS HOLIDAY HOME!!! Nevermind the fact that we will always have this guy next door who we cant talk to….

I pray that one day when I have lots of money to throw at a holiday home that I don’t behave like an a-hole!!!

But on a lighter note…..we’re still looking at end of Feb finish and right now Buildwise is living up their promises and we’re on track.

I must say if you need a builder in Durban/Ballito, you need to give these guys a call. Same goes for our architect who has been a star and is always willing to take my calls….and there have been lots of them!!!

2.28 oct

28 October

3. 1 nov

1 November

4. 4 novphoto 1

4 November

5 nov photo 5

5 November

10 nov

10 November

 

Stop the world!

Warning this post is not pretty….. Fortunately for me it’s my space

It’s been another shit day! I wanna scream from the top of my lungs ‘stop the world I wanna hop off’

I’m so sick of hearing that God only gives you what you can handle but ffs enough already! I don’t want to handle anymore. I wanna sit in a corner and ball my eyes out and shout and scream at God because I’m angry, I’m so fucking angry

My dad saw the neurologist today and he left with a morphine patch script and script for strong sleeping tablets so that my mom can try get a full night sleep. We were told to make him comfortable to cut down the speech therapy to twice a week and up the physio to keep him pain free.

After his whole life slaving for a firm whose partners of 25 yrs bad mouthing him every chance they get, his life had culminated in sitting in a wheelchair unable to walk or talk. Wtf!! You tell me how that is fair?? He’s a good man, how is he supposed to deserve this and how are we supposed to get some meaning out of the fact that he will never walk or talk again but instead will for want of a better word live like a vegetable for 1……5…..maybe 10years!

And what kind of person does it make me that I wish he would just have another stroke and go…..but that all I now ask is to selfishly let him hold my newborn baby in December before he does……

And then there’s the build…… Stupid I know building a house while pregnant, so I suppose I deserve this part. But today we get a quote for piling for R75 0000, bearing in mind that when we got the report from the engineer there was no pilling and we all did happy dances because we were on virgin ground!!

They say always account for a 20% overspend on cost! we’ll my dear friends we’ve frikking blown that!! LONG time ago! So some serious questions going to the engineer tomorrow as to how their initial drawings estimated no piling and a tiny retaining wall and we’ve ended up with R94k in retaining walls and R75k in piling? Someone clearly hasn’t done their job. BUT it doesn’t help the fact that we have house plans, a plot and a build overspent by R170k and we haven’t started foundations! So what to do!

So like I said just stop that world for a second I want out!

Reality

Its been so long since I wrote I’m not sure where to begin.

It’s been a frikking awful month, let me just get that out there! Now that being said, we are however on the other side….well almost and things seems to be looking up in parts.

The Build:

20140819-202952-73792002.jpgThis will come as NO surprise to anyone that has built a house but its been a nightmare! The best part is we haven’t even started the foundations. All this kak  has been around retaining walls and neighbours and well plain and simple, just too many cooks in the kitchen!! Doesn’t help working a full day, being pregnant ,having a household to run and the saga with my dad.

But as I said things seems to be looking up and so far we’ve had two good days with things kind of falling into place and it looks like the walls will be done by Thursday and that we can start cutting foundations

Lessons learnt:

  • Don’t get too many people involved – too many cooks spoil the broth
  • Go with your gut
  • Don’t involved friends as service providers  – even if you are paying them, you still somehow lose power and cant make decisions without the complication of hurting feelings or not being able to say what you really feel.

Midlands weekend:

20140819-205306-75186484.jpgIt wasn’t all doom and gloom. We did have a weekend away booked. And it couldn’t have come at a better time. Rich and I at that stage were at our wits end with the build and very stressed about a whole host of things.

We went to the Midlands saddle and trout and what a lovely place. We really relaxed in the short time we were there and got to spend some quality time as a family….something that hadn’t happened since Dad’s stroke.

Dad:

It’s not good. Dad spent two weeks in Entabeni Rehab facility and really battled. It’s a great facility in terms of therapy but its a still a hospital and so we prayed about it and then things kind of fell into place for us to bring him home. It’s flipping hard tho. Although we have a full time carer to assist mom, it’s a full time job for her and mom is taking serious strain,as are we all. People that dont see dad for a few weeks notice a huge recovery. We on the other hand not so much. We also received some news after seeing the neurologist that Dad’s scans show that his carotid artery that is feeding the good side of hte brain is totally calcified and the one feeding the damaged brain is not so good either. There is nothing that can be done and so we now are in the hands of God and leaving it up to faith. There is nothing else that one can do but pray and hope for a miracle.

On a positive note Dad is able to stand up and “Walk” assisted – by kicked up the paralysed leg and then stepping on it. There are also good days where he will say a full sentence. For example he said to me clearly on Sunday: “how – do – you-do- it” referring to the loom band craze of my nieces …he was asking how you make the looms band bracelets.  But mostly its still monolgues and there is very definitely major damage.

It hard because one can’t help but wish to turn the clock back. I wish I had played the guitar more with him. I wish i’d sung that extra song. I wish I’d had this baby sooner so that he would have known it. It makes me sick to the pit of my stomach with regret and its so sad that it takes something so tragic to make you appreciate life and what you have…had

But we continue to pray for a miracle and who knows Dad may just talk again and oh how I long for a conversation with my father!

The Ginger:

20140819-203843-74323074.jpg

20140819-203843-74323405.jpg

20140819-203843-74323720.jpg

20140819-203844-74324137.jpg
Daniel continues to be the most amazing source of joy in our lives. He is growing into the most amazing kid. Maybe my love is also blossoming because he has clearly been going through a growth spurt and as a result is eating us out of house and home and then been sleeping in till 6:30am for the past three mornings!!! I am also treasuring the one on one time I have with him and spending as much time as I can with him in the afternoons before bed. This involves a lot of lying on the couch but I really am treasuring these moments before baby 2 arrives

The Ablet:

20140819-203514-74114560.jpg

20140819-203514-74114675.jpg

20140819-203514-74114612.jpg

20140819-203514-74114510.jpg

20140819-203514-74114455.jpg
The belly continues to grow and can you believe I’m 22 weeks already! Its been a very stressful pregnancy with the situation with my dad and baby is a very quiet one. So I was most relieved to go for a high foetal scan at 20 weeks and Dr Borat was lovely and assured me that everything is as it should be. He also confirmed that my placenta is anterior which is why I dont feel many kicks from the little one.

I was however very blessed that Rich got to feel the Ablet kick for the second time last night. (first time was 7 weeks ago!) Its a very special moment even the second time.

And that’s life in a nutshell blog post.

Coming up is a weekend away with our church. We missed it last year as we had just joined CCNC. Really looking forward to it and spending time making new friends.

Then in two weekends time we are celebrating the gingers 3rd birthday. It’s cowboy party and the only two requests were a toy story cake and jumping castle. No guess what he’s getting then 🙂

So a busy few weekends ahead